Lots of women have a ‘No’ that’s not very sexy - lacking in teeth and spine and conviction…
‘No’ gets unsexy when obligation is loud, external pressure increases, and – most importantly – your ability to make yourself as important as the other stuff in your life is wobbly.
That last one is the kicker.
I’ve seen women take a very unsexy No and make it sexy…restore their relationships with themselves to the point that they could have good boundaries around their time and energy.
I’ve also seen women who HAVEN’T yet gone on that journey of making themselves matter live in a constant state of over-giving, exhaustion, resentment and depletion…
It’s ultimately a choice to confront that part of you who believes you ‘should be able to do it all’ and feels embarrassed to call on support.
Or the part of you that loves and cares for others through your actions with no limits.
Or the part of you that has to be the one in control and struggles to delegate…
My husband and I live in a small apartment. We still choose to have a cleaner come through every fortnight.
We work from home, so we use the time each fortnight when the cleaner comes to go get a coffee and discuss our businesses and what we’re working on or need support with. (Photos at the top of this blog are from today’s coffee date adventure!)
I regularly encourage and support my clients to delegate and outsource in their lives and work, like hiring executive assistants and bringing on a house keeper – someone who’s more than just cleaner and can help with the laundry, meal preparation and grocery shopping.
These things sound obvious, but it blows me away how many women simply haven’t considered expanding their circle of support.
Or have considered it, and then talked themselves out of it for a MYRIAD of reasons that (if we’re really honest) are mostly crap.
Underneath all of this is a woman’s NO.
No to doing the repeated tasks that I can afford to get support with that don’t bring me joy.
No to skipping the things that light up my soul to prioritise domestic responsibilities.
No to being constantly exhausted.
No to feeling guilty when I rest.
No to telling myself, my family and the world that my needs aren’t important.
And that, is a sexy NO if you ask me. 👌🏼
So, what have you wanted to delegate or get support with, but talked yourself out of…and underneath that, what is it that you’re actually saying NO to?
🦸🏼♀️🦸🏼♀️🦸🏼♀️
If this resonates for you, try my new Superwoman Circuit Breaker for free here. It’ll help you interrupt your reflexive yes and stop saying yes to everyone but yourself.
